Go Jim Webb!

Why be polite to a man who suspends habeas corpus and murders thousands for political gain? Give him, at least, the impression you're not thrilled.

In Need of an Actress...Tomorrow or Sooner

Hey everyone...

I'm in need of an actress for my play in Blue Coyote's "Standards of Decency" which will begin rehearsing pretty much immediately, and run from Dec. 12 - 17th. The play is just over 10 minutes and there's not very much to memorize.

The issue we're having is:

The role requires someone who is willing to be fully nude in an objectifying situation. I've had several actresses look at it and say that they wouldn't be comfortable. I think that's important to stress.

I do need someone immediately, it's a great opportunity to meet nine fantastic playwrights, actors and directors.

Details for the show can be found here.

If interested, contact me here. I will send you a copy of the script, which is called "What To Do To A Girl."

Tom's Big Day Out

A Poor Player has some coffee and a donut and writes about the theatre scene in NYC a bit. Great post.

An open question to New York Theatre Critics

Would you write one of these? Please?

Not because you're often wrong, but because a little mea culpa makes the heart grow fonder.

Standards of Decency: Nytheatrecast

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Martin Denton speaks to me, Kyle Ancowitz and Stan Richardson about the Standards of Decency Project. Find it here.

Tickets for The Standards of Decency Project

Blue Coyote Web Site.

Just want tickets? Get them here.

Standards of Decency Project / Audio

Dates have changed to December 12-16th. Jot it down.

Kyle Ancowitz and Stan Richardson and I just recorded an interview with www.nytheatre.com regarding the Project. Should be posted soon.

Note two new links to the side: My "CastPost" blog, which has two old audio files I recorded a ways back. I'm planning on adding more those in the coming weeks.

Also, the original interview MP3 re: The Most Wonderful Love.

Give them a listen!

Overheard in New York

A constant joy.

This one, in particular.

Standards of Decency

Mark your calendars

Blue Coyote Theatre Group, at the Access Theatre, will present Standards of Decency: nine short plays which "offend conventional standards." Playwrights include:

Brian Dykstra, David Foley, Matthew Freeman, Laura E. Henry, David Johnston, Boo Killebrew, Kristen Palmer, Stan Richardson and John Yearley.

Dates of the performances will be

December 7th - 9th
and
December 13-16th.

I'll post official information and Smarttix link as soon as they're available.

My piece is entitled: "What to Do to a Girl."

Warning: Not for kids or your Momma.

Emergency Sex (and other Desperate Measures)

I've just finished reading Emergency Sex (and other Desperate Measures), which manages to be full of fantastic first person narrative, young, fresh, terrifying and accurate. In stark contrast to the ultimately thin "My Name is Rachel Corrie" (its hubub is still in the air), Emergency Sex allows for the narcissism and hubris that is almost necessary for this type of political activism and then combines it with the realities on the ground.

I hear it's been optioned for a film. Good. I recommend it highly.

Next Generation Consoles

While I haven't written about games in a while, Tom Samiljan (who I once had the pleasure of watching Ultimate Fighting Championship with, live in Atlantic City) has a nice piece that runs down the next gen console offerings. Here's my take:

At first glance, the Wii is your console if you're looking to get onboard with the new gaming market without breaking the bank or ruining your sex life. It's got the lowest price by far, and if you're reading this blog, you might as well accept that you don't have an easy $600 bucks to spend on a gaming console. It also offers some truly new things... like the motion sensor interface and Wi-Fi and a downloadable library of new titles. It also offers a great launch title: Twilight Princess.

Do not, though, count out PS3 or Xbox 360. These systems have had rocky starts, but that's for two basic reasons:

1. Most people aren't gearheads who give a crap about 480p vs 1080p. If you're not someone who worries about component cables or HD TV, etc, etc...then you won't be able to tell much of a difference graphically. Are you jonesing for Blu-Ray, or have you never heard of Blu-Ray? That's what I thought.

2. Games. Consoles do not sell themselves...people buy games. Wii, for its pittance of a price, offers up a great launch title that people will want to play. When will most gamers surrender to Microsoft or Sony? When Grand Theft Auto and Halo come out, respectively, for the next gen. They'll buy the consoles to play those games...and not before.

In the end, it's fantastic to see Ninetendo primed to take up some of the market real estate they lost to the messy release of the Gamecube. PS3 is stalling in its launch, and Xbox 360 is grand, but its launch titles failed to captivate. Neither of these giants are about to go anywhere, though. They're just going to have to settle for hardcore gamers until their most popular titles hit the streets. Wii, though, won't have that problem.

Mario Party anyone?

The Internationalist

Haven't seen the production, but it's a New York blogsphere play day. Check out Isaac's post here for Washburn Grand Central.

I can't talk about the play, which I haven't seen.

As for the responses I'm reading (from out here in "not having met Anne" country) it seems that there is a disconnect between the actual theatergoing audience and those that make theatre. What directors and writers respect and admire in Washburn may be something that just doesn't translate to the regular spectator.

That may be overstating.

Ms. Washburn's plays are, obviously, obscure and challenging. I was reading Apparition at St. Mark's Books the other day, out of curiosity, and while I didn't ingest it carefully standing in the bookstore, I didn't find much to hold onto in it. That isn't necessarily a flaw, it just means that work like that is inviting strong opinions for and against. I can't imagine Washburn doesn't know she'll lose half her audience's attention with this work... and it's a credit to her that she persists with her own aesthetic without compromise. That being said, it doesn't guarantee that she'll be embraced by a large audience.

It's a deal with the devil. If you push the audience, some will push back.

Maybe, in the long term, we need to seek to cultivate a new audience for the Vineyard. But that's a post for the future.

Gay Marriage Approved by Parliament in South Africa

SOUTH AFRICA has trumped the United States in social progressiveness.

BURST INTO FLAMES! (I feel 'off' today)

Ah ha!

That's what I wish my laptop would have done.

Instead, it just sort of threw up an error message and politely gave up the ghost. Thank God I backed up MOST of my work. Just a few things are currently having to be recreated, the very latest pages on myriad writing projects.

I will, of course, be taking this out on my all my friends and family, as I drink and complain and make awful noises about karma.

That is my nature.

Sometimes.

I feel vaguely erratic. Vaguely.

I have a ten-minute play due in two days. I have no ideas. It has to be about decency. About obscenity. I want ideas. Give them to me, oh blog-readers. Provide me with my living.

(There must be something more important to think about. Like the nature of a burrito.)

Harry Potter Blinds Horses With a Rail Spike

No, seriously. He does.

Daniel Radcliffe as Alan Strang in Equus.

Frankly, I'm curious to see how he is. You've got to give him credit for taking it on, knowing the kind of attention he'll bring the play.

Donald Rumsfeld's Letter of Resignation

Got this from an inside source:

"Dear George:

God, it's been a long strange trip. Who knew that after all this 'blood under the bridge,' I'd be secretly sneaking into your office at this hour, drunk on the good stuff, writing this letter of resignation on the back of a White House napkin? I mean, some people might have expected it, and I'm sure you'll make it all sound great at the press conference tomorrow, but for now, just between you and I...shit, brother. This is wack.

Last night, as the election results came in, and Turd Blossom held is crackberry close to his heart and started reciting districts in that random, speaking-in-tongues creepy way he does, I started to get the impression that people were blaming me for all this. Maybe it was the grass making me paranoid... but hell, it is my fault isn't it? Well, mine and yours. And the CIA. And, fuck, we all really screwed the pooch on this one didn't we? But it's mine too, and that's cool. I can take the heat. I'm a macho man, and I can cross my arms in that way that makes your biceps look bigger (you know, with your fists under your arms?), and if I cause the deaths of lots of innocent people, like a lot of them, I'll admit it. I was wrong. I mean, I knew I was wrong from the start... but now that I'm really drunk and high, I' m starting to fucking understand it.

When we looked at Iraq at the start, I was just seeing the buildings, you know? There were some great targets there, for some good explosions and firefights, and that looks GOOD when you're running for office. Also, Saddam had the moustache thing going, which is totally a Hitler thing, but he also wasn't working the beard like Osama, so I figured...hell, not ALL Muslims will hate us. I also figured, you know, we could win in Afghanistan all day, but it's just like goats and fields and stuff. No headlines. It was a total waste of time.

Now I see that Iraq is this gigantic, mult-layered, culturally diverse COUNTRY. Even if it was invented, sort of, by limeys. Think about it: It's got like tons of shit in it. I heard that a lot of what happens in the Bible happened in Iraq. No joke. Look it up.

Well we bombed it. Tons of it. Like most of it. Well half. More than half? Who gives a shit?

Now, because we didn't bomb it completely gone, there's a bunch of communist women who are about to tell us how to think about black people. That's what going to happen. They're going to come into the Congress, and they're going to tell us to pay servants a decent wage, and insist on healthcare for people (shitheads, healthcare costs money), and they're going to abort everything and marry men to other men, and they're going to try to fix the mess we made in the Middle East. As if that's their mess. It's MY damn mess. Fuckers.

Anyway, I know this isn't the best way to tell you all this. I've gone through like...wait...15 napkins. Something like that. My pants are off because I puked on them. I mean everywhere. I can't hold my liquor like Cheney's old lady can. Not since I got so old.

Christ I feel old. It's time for Rummy to say "Gin!" Or something. Is that a way to say "I quit?" I quit. I'm sorry. Next time we do this, I'll pick a smaller country and I'll do it with more guys. We'll outnumber their population 2-to-1 next time. No joke. It'll be amazing.

This time, though, I'm going to head home to wherever it is I come from, let the wave of guilt and regret wash over me, hit myself repeatedly with a golf club, and pray for the best. I know everything thinks the Liberals control Congress because of me, I know they do, and I can't face that shit. I won't take that one lying down. I'll take it alone, in my home, while you negotiate with a chick from San Francisco. Good luck to you on that... she's got the whitest teeth on earth. White like a shark.

What am I talking about?

I don't give a shit anymore. I quit.

Your Secretary of Defense,

Don"

Donald Rumsfeld to Resign

Just hit the AP. No details.

I still couldn't help but just say so. On this blog. Right now. Out of sheer joy.

Recounts, and Tigers and Bears: Oh My!

The fact that Democrats have won the House is certainly a glorious thing: it shows that it only took six years for voters to become angry enough at Bush to take it out on his slaves.

The Resume of George Bush

Thanks to Ms. Buller for this.

______

RESUME
GEORGE W. BUSH
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC20520

EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE

LAW ENFORCEMENT

I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days.

My Texas driving record has been lost and is not available.

MILITARY

I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam

COLLEGE

I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was a cheerleader.

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE

I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.

I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.

With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry, including Enron CEO Ken Lay, I was elected governor of Texas.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS

I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.

I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.

I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.

With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT

I am the first President in U.S.history to enter office with a criminal record.

I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.

I spent the U.S.surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.

I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.

I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.

I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.

I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market.

In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month.

I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S.history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, had a Chevron oil tanker named after her.

I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S.

I am the all-time U.S.and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.

My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History, Enron.

My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.

I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or prosecution.

More time and money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.

I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S.history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.

I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.

I changed the U.S.policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.

I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S.history.

I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United Statesgovernment.

I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S.history.

I am the first President in U.S.history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.

I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.

I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S . "prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.

I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S.election).

I set the record for fewest numbers of press conferences of any President since the advent of television.

I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period.

After taking off the entire month of August, I presided over the worst security failure in U.S.history.

I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S.the most hated country in the world, the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.

I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to Simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind.

I am the first President in U.S.history to order an unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation.

I did so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community.

I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops and their families-in-wartime.

In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for Attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends.

I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.

I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.

I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.

RECORDS AND REFERENCES

All records of my tenure as governor of Texasare now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view. All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.

All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.

I am a member of the Republican Party.

PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN THE 2006 MIDTERM ELECTIONS.

Stolen Chair!

Stolen!

These guys have a blog. READ it.

Saddam Hussein is Sentenced to Death

Two days before the mid-term elections in the U.S.

Hm.

Working out the new stuff

I'm sitting here trying to write a bit of a little outside project, and also mulling "The Shadow" and "The Man Who Caught Death in a Bag." Perhaps I'll do a little public discussion of where I am with the creative work, and how I'm feeling.

First of all, my self-imposed deadlines came and went for both "The Shadow" and "The Man Who Caught Death in a Bag." Neither play is finished. Certainly not good practice or discipline, and it underscores to me (and should to anyone reading this) how vital even INVENTED deadlines are. Life is full of priorities, wizzers, buzzers, flashing lights and travel issues. It is incredibly easy to let the creative process fall on the list of immediate needs, and then get derailed.

I'm feeling, more than ever, that this has happened to "The Man Who Caught Death in a Bag." Every time I sit down to write it, it seems a bit more alien and distant to me... a bit less like a play I should be writing now, and a bit less like I know how to write it. I love the ideas and the language of it thus far, I think, at its core, it is a play that would allow me to get involved in some of my own intellectual fetishes and emotional trouble spots. Nonetheless, it might be that I don't have the will or wherewithal to write something of that sort at the moment.

One of the interesting things about writing plays is that you are, as you write it, anticipating the end result. Certain elements can be in place that can protect a play from total failure. For example, a well-constructed narrative can often give a director and actors enough to cover up oddly or poorly written moments. Sometimes, the writing can be strong enough to make construction less important... a single conceit can be carried simply by powerful wordplay and little else.

"The Man Who Caught Death in a Bag" intimidates me because it requires four neatly constructed narratives, that are presented by three characters onstage, at once. Each character plays the same person, Matthew Connon. Each Matthew Connon tells of finding a story that his missing father wrote. Then, we hear the story, and the story of each different Connon's engagement with this story. Each version of Connon is unique (one is married, one is not, one is aware that he is a construction of the playwright, the other two are not, etc.) but shares common elements. Each of them is reading the same story, and each of them goes about responding to that story in a different way.

That's the ambition.

The truth is, telling someone that and actually constructing this thing are entirely different. There is no correlation, unfortunately, between explaining the idea of a play and actually writing the thing. None, as far as I can tell, at all. Because, as we speak, this idea has failed to be born properly. Something intangible is lost between the concept and the execution. It could be confidence, or self-doubt, or just that I need to write something funny right now and this feels to serious.

I'm honestly not sure. That's the beauty and horror of the whole enterprise. No one actually knows how to do any of this.

"The Shadow" on the other hand, isn't done simply because I haven't finished it. It would probably take about two hours to complete a first draft. No excuses...that's just laziness. And the guy who's waiting for it (this guy) is a bit busy anyhow.

To add to these things is a 10 minute play I've bee commissioned to write for Blue Coyote. Hm. Due November 15th. Hm. Better write that one.

Is it just me, or could I have written that play in the time it took me to write this entry?

Onwards and upwards. Thanks for your indulgence.

Weekend Question

How do you define obscene?

Discuss!

Phantasmaphile

Have you checked out her blog lately? Because it's still brilliant.

Report on Bloggers

Interesting Pew PDF on the identity of bloggers. Take a read.

Isn't there something in the Bible...

About reaping what you sow?

To me, it doesn't matter if it's true or false. I just love to see bigots humiliated. It floods my brain with happy chemicals.

They Got Al Capone for Tax Evasion

So Ann Coulter will receive, perhaps, similar recompense?

The Times They Are A-Changin'

The first concert I ever attended was a Bob Dylan concert in Virginia with my Uncle Bruce.

I've read Dylan's books (even Tarantula) and I've memorized half his song book. I even checked out Masked and Anonymous. All of this takes dedication.

But I will not subject myself to this.

John Kerry and the "Liberal" Media

Strange that during a season of real political crisis in this country, the supposedly liberal media is covering yet another Republican fiction ("John Kerry insults the troops"). John Kerry's misstatement is the opposite of news, and in order to CREATE it as news, one must decide to:

- cover an invention of the Republican attack machine
- ignore Kerry's entire history of statements that show his deep understanding of and support of the US military' s proper role and use
- treat someone who is NOT up for election as more important than those that are
- treat all sides as if they have merit, and eschew all analysis of that merit
- stop putting the disaster in Iraq or the curtailing of civil rights on the front page

Seems simple isn't it? John Kerry's verbal error, made in front of a bunch of students, is more important that the wanton lies that Bush makes to the country.

We did it! We're a failed Democracy! Hoooray!