About Me
- Freeman
- Matthew Freeman is a Brooklyn based playwright with a BFA from Emerson College. His plays include THE DEATH OF KING ARTHUR, REASONS FOR MOVING, THE GREAT ESCAPE, THE AMERICANS, THE WHITE SWALLOW, AN INTERVIEW WITH THE AUTHOR, THE MOST WONDERFUL LOVE, WHEN IS A CLOCK, GLEE CLUB, THAT OLD SOFT SHOE and BRANDYWINE DISTILLERY FIRE. He served as Assistant Producer and Senior Writer for the live webcast from Times Square on New Year's Eve 2010-2012. As a freelance writer, he has contributed to Gamespy, Premiere, Complex Magazine, Maxim Online, and MTV Magazine. His plays have been published by Playscripts, Inc., New York Theatre Experience, and Samuel French.
4 comments:
Neon and argon walk into a bar. The bartender says, "we don't serve noble gases here."
Neon and argon don't react.
A guy walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."
A guy is sitting in a dive bar on the lower east side, the kind of place that's been there a long time and always had shit beer and shittier service, peanut shells on the floor, you know the kind.
He looks over at the end of the bar, and over there, by the door, just a little bit of sunlight hitting him, it's Hitler. Or someone who looks very much like Hitler. He's older, you know, but the guy, he figures, this is Hitler.
So he sidles on up to him and says, "Can I buy you a drink?"
And the guy replies, "Ja."
And our man says, "I hope you don't mind my asking this... but... uh... are you Adolf Hitler?"
And teh guy says, "Ja!"
And our man says, "I knew it! I knew you didn't die! I knew it was faked! Wow! This is incredible!"
And the guy says: "Ja."
So their drinks arrive and they drink 'em and our man starts to get curious like, so he says to Hitler, "Hey,.... you working on any big plans?"
And Hitler replies, "Ja! I have big plans!"
And our guy says, "What are they?"
And Hitler says, "I have a doozy! We will kill ALL ze JEWS! Und FIFTEEN BALLERINAS!"
And our guy says, "Um. Why are you going to kill fifteen ballerinas?"
And Hitler says: "See! I told you! No one cares about ze Jews!"
Butler, I love that joke! I always use "circus clowns" though. That's how Kyle told it to me.
I love jokes! Jokes!
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